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Writer's pictureMarcus Flenaugh

From Eye Rolls to Thank-You's: Teaching Teens Gratitude (Yes, It’s Possible

After 25 years of working with teens, I can confidently say that gratitude and kindness are game-changers—not just for the people who benefit from them but for the teens themselves. And let’s face it, teens don’t always scream gratitude, right? But with Thanksgiving coming up, November gives us the perfect chance to flip the script and encourage them to think about what they’re thankful for and how they can give back to the world around them.


Why Gratitude Matters for Teens

Gratitude isn’t just about saying “thank you.” It’s a mindset that helps teens appreciate what they have, even when life feels overwhelming. In a world where young people are often bombarded with messages about what they don’t have—whether it’s the latest gadget, the best grades, or a “perfect” life on social media—practicing gratitude can be a game-changer. Research even shows that gratitude can improve mental health, enhance their self-esteem, and cultivate stronger relationships, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and balanced life.


Teaching Teens to Give Back

Giving back doesn’t have to be complicated. In fact, some of the most meaningful acts of kindness are simple and heartfelt. Encourage teens to look for small ways to make a difference, like helping a sibling with homework, writing a thank-you note to a teacher, or volunteering a few hours at a local organization (like South Side Help Center). These small acts not only help others but also give teens a sense of purpose and pride.


Real-Life Examples of Kindness in Action

Over the years, I’ve watched teens light up when they realize how much impact they can have. I think of the group of students who organized a food drive for homeless youth in need. At first, they thought it was just “another community project.” But when they saw the smiles on the faces of youth receiving the food donations, their perspective shifted. They realized their efforts mattered—and that’s a lesson that sticks for life.


How Families Can Foster Gratitude and Kindness

Families play a key role in teaching these values. Take time to ask “What’s something good that happened today?” or “Who’s someone you appreciate, and why?” These small conversations can help teens focus on the positives and see the value in expressing gratitude. As a family, you can also get involved in giving back. Volunteer together, participate in a community cleanup, or even start a small tradition like leaving thank-you notes for service workers. These shared experiences create memories while reinforcing the importance of kindness.


Looking Ahead

As we enter the holiday season, let's remind both our teens and ourselves that gratitude and giving extend beyond just a single day or season. They involve cultivating habits that can change our perspective on the world and our place within it.


So, this November, let’s challenge our young people to focus on what they can do to make their world a little brighter. And let’s support them every step of the way. After all, Acts of kindness, no matter how small, create ripples that can transform our communities—and our teens are the key to making that happen.


How have you inspired gratitude and kindness among the teenagers you know? I'd love to hear your stories in the comments!

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